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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25358995">50 Years Before You</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/fandomramblings/pseuds/fandomramblings'>fandomramblings</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Malex Week 2020 [6]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst and Feels, Fluff, Inspired by Music, Love Confessions, M/M, Malex Week 2020, POV Alex Manes, Reunions, Talking</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 08:20:00</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,472</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25358995</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/fandomramblings/pseuds/fandomramblings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Michael goes a bit crazy trying to tell Alex he loves him. It’s mostly my nonsensical ramblings at a certain point. But I hope you enjoy it nonetheless.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Michael Guerin/Alex Manes</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Malex Week 2020 [6]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1831072</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>88</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>50 Years Before You</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Malex Week 2020 Day 6. Since today’s theme is music I picked The Luckiest by Ben Folds. I listened to it recently for the first time in a while and it just screamed Malex. Here are the words, cause I know it’s not a very well known song. Listen to it. It’s great!</p><p>I don't get many things right the first time,<br/>In fact, I am told that a lot<br/>Now I know all the wrong turns the stumbles,<br/>And falls brought me here<br/>And where was I before the day<br/>That I first saw your lovely face,<br/>Now I see it every day<br/>And I know<br/>That I am, I am, I am, the luckiest</p><p>What if I had been born fifty years before you<br/>In a house on the street<br/>Where you lived<br/>Maybe I'd be outside as you passed on your bike. Would I know?<br/>And in a wide sea of eyes<br/>I see one pair that I recognize<br/>And I know<br/>That I am, I am, I am, the luckiest</p><p>I love you more then have<br/>Ever found the way to say<br/>To you</p><p>Next door there's an old man who lived to his nineties and one day<br/>Passed away in his sleep,<br/>And his wife, she stayed for a couple of days, and passed away<br/>I'm sorry I know that's a strange way to tell you that I know we belong,<br/>That I know<br/>That I am, I am, I am, the luckiest</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Alex carefully folded the last paper and slid it into the filing cabinet. Then he leaned back in his chair and grinned. It had been arduous and often upsetting work. But he had now downloaded, printed, read, and filed away, every bit of his father’s horrible research. He had then wiped Jesse’s hard drive, cloud, and email. He’d even gone so far as to hack his father’s Facebook. Which it turned out Jesse had barely used and was pretty harmless. He deleted the account just to be safe. He spun around in the chair a few times and at the end of the last rotation, kicked the drawer closed with his prosthetic foot. He then began to laugh at himself. And once Alex started he couldn’t stop. It was an odd reaction for him, but he was just feeling so much better lately. He snorted and giggled and was wiping at his eyes with the bottom of his t-shirt when he heard a coughing noise. He spun the chair towards the door and his laughter died.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Don’t stop on my account. I was enjoying the show,” said Michael Guerin, as he motioned toward Alex’s exposed stomach. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Alex pulled his shirt back down quickly and finished wiping at his eyes with the back of his palm. “How did you?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Michael was smiling at him now, leaning against the door frame. “Greg gave me a key,” he said and he stepped forward into the room, taking off his black cowboy hat. “He said you were close to being finished and I thought I’d surprise you.” Alex didn’t respond to that. He had all of a sudden became hyper-aware of everything in the room. Was he sitting oddly? Should he stand up? Was it hot in here? How many feet were between them? Where did Michael earn the right to look so good?</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Surprise me?” He said finally, managing to stand up. This was ridiculous. He shouldn’t still feel this way. He and Michael hadn’t talked in weeks, not since the open mic night. Things had settled into a new normal. He had been out with Forrest a few times and was getting used to his new government analyst desk job. He’d even been thinking about getting a dog.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Yeah,” Michael said, stepping toward him. He even sounded a little nervous. “Wanna go for a ride?” Alex looked back toward the filing cabinet. Had Michael been waiting for this? When he would be done analyzing what was left of his father’s work? Like he was waiting for the right time for something?</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I… uh… How’s Maria!?” Alex blurted out. He could feel his face turning scarlet. Michael didn’t look upset, but he did stop his slow walk towards Alex.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“She’s great,” he said, rotating the hat around in his hands. “Um, focusing on helping her mom right now, and the pony and…” he trailed off. “She dumped me actually. Smart cookie that one.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">It was a poor attempt at a joke, but Alex hardly cared. He looked back up at Michael, and damn he tried not to, but he knew he looked hopeful.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Michael took a deep breath and started forward again. “I’d really like it if you came with me. At least for a little while. I want to talk.” Alex could only nod. He started towards the front door and caught a strong whiff of rain as he passed Michael, who followed after him. Michael's truck was parked in the driveway and Alex got in the passenger seat, his eyes remained straight forward. He was afraid to look at Michael too much. What if this didn’t turn out to be what he thought. Alex’s heart was pounding as the other man climbed into the driver’s seat. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">They drove in silence for a long time, out of town and down a winding road into the desert. Alex clenched his hands in his lap and stared out the window. Michael didn’t push things. He seemed to have a destination in mind. Soon they were at the cave with the alien eggs. Alex had been there once before. He remembered it clear as day. Michael had told him that he was done with him and that they were bad for each other and it had taken Alex so long to get up the courage to talk to him again. The silence continued as Alex followed Michael into the cave. Soon the glowing blue light was visible and they were entering the large chamber. Alex stopped in his tracks and stepped back a bit as Michael stopped abruptly and turned toward him. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Sorry.” Michael giggled nervously. It was very unlike him. He was very close to Alex now. He could have reached out and laid his hand on Michael’s chest like he so badly wanted to, but he didn’t.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Guerin I…” Alex started. He felt like someone should say something, because Michael was just standing there, looking into Alex’s eyes and playing with his hat more. What was going on with him?</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Give me a second.” Michael interrupted. “I want to do this right.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Do what right? Alex was starting to lose his cool. Was this the cowboy's idea of a joke? He watched the hat continue to spin and then almost as a reflex, he reached out and grasped Michael’s hand, stopping him from fiddling. He inhaled sharply at Alex’s touch. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Michael,” Alex whispered. Their faces were so close now “Please.” To his shock, Michael stepped away from him and began to pace. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“50 years!” He said. Alex blinked.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“What?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“50 years we were down here! And we woke up alone! And I was so angry for so long. Why did they leave us here? And the answers we got this past year Alex, it just was making it worse. All those months I could have been with her! Known her!” Michael had stopped now and was standing in the middle of the cave. It’s as if the word damn had broken and now he couldn’t stop.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“But I’ve realized something Alex! It’s all about timing. And I’m so lucky!”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Lucky? Alex was lost for words, but Michael just kept going.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“We arrived here 50 years before you Alex. I missed you by 50 years! But it still all worked out. I mean what luck is that?!” He was smiling now, grinning at Alex, and also, he noticed, crying.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Alex couldn’t speak, he couldn’t move, it was all too much. Hope was rushing at him like a tidal wave and he couldn’t stop it.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I got it wrong the first time. We’re not a sad story. We don’t have bad timing. We’re not bad for each other. It’s like… I don’t know. If we’d hatched back in the 40’s I think I still would have known you. Maybe differently, but I still would have you in my life. I know it sounds crazy but galaxies, other planets, spaceship crashes, fucking 50 year gestation periods. All the mistakes I’ve made and you’re still here. We’re still here. I’m the luckiest!”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Michael I…” Alex ran a hand through his hair. Then Michael was right there, and his hands were on Alex’s face. Alex gripped his wrists to steady himself. “I don’t understand.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“What I’m trying to tell you, I haven’t had the words before. God, it’s so hard for me sometimes. I haven’t found a way to say it, not till now. Everything’s brought me here to the right time, the right planet. Where you are. I see you Alex. I’d recognize you in any life. In any place. I see us clearly now. I get it. We’re lucky Alex, that in all the ways we could have known each other, we know each other this perfect improbable uncanny cosmic way! I don’t want to wait anymore. I want to make the luck count. I want to tell you all this so you know how special you are. How special we are. So you know how much I love you.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Well.” Alex was well and truly crying now. “Multiverse theory is not exactly what I was expecting. I would be lying if I said you weren’t scaring me a bit right now. But…” Michael laughed through his tears and Alex laughed with him. And then Michael was no longer laughing because Alex was kissing him. They wrapped their arms around each other and kissed and kissed until they were both out of breath. Then Michael nuzzled into Alex, pressing his lips softly to his neck. Alex hugged Michael to him and their tears soaked into each other's shirts.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I know it’s a strange way to tell you,” Michael whispered into Alex’s ear. “But I know we belong.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“You’ve always been a bit strange Michael.” Alex chuckled. “And just so you know. In any timeline. I love you too.”</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Comments and Kudos welcome! Come squeal with me on Tumblr at malex-art</p></blockquote></div></div>
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